Sonic Rush Parody
by RigorM0RTIS
Summary: Title is very self-explanatory. This is a parody of Sonic Rush, in script form! Warning: OOC, lots of OOC. If you don't want to read any OOC, Cream-hating, or anything else you'd better brace yourself from, please turn away now. Rated for lots of language and references.
1. Blaze's Story

Blaze: "OH DEAR GOD! What IS this? What's happened to me? LE GASP The Sol Emeralds!  
My world will be in trouble without them! That mustached old creep... How did he  
obtain the Sol Emeralds?! I remember now. I followed him... Then I got engulfed  
by a white light! But, where am I? Am I in a stupid other dimension? It  
shouldn't matter now. I've got to locate the Sol Emeralds! I've got to recover  
them! Otherwise, my world will be in grave danger. Anyway, I should first look  
around for clues."

*Before Night Carnival Boss Battle*  
Blaze: "Hey bastard! I finally found you!"  
Eggman: "Ah, that cat chick I saw when I made a visit to that other universe. Welcome aboard to this world"  
Blaze: "(He said "this world"... As I suspected, this is another world! Wait.. NOOOO!) Return  
the Sol Emeralds! They must return to my world, otherwise... bad things will happen to you!"  
Eggman: "Mwa ha ha ha. You mean these pretty little things?"  
Blaze: "!"  
Eggman: "They are my means to ultimate sexy. Now scat, woman!"  
Blaze: "Hmm, it seems you like to play with fire... LET ME SCALD YOU TO  
DEATH!"

*After Night Carnival Boss Battle*  
Blaze: "Now, if you return them quietly, I won't need to kill you..."  
Eggman: "Hmph, you bitch! Your tricks won't work on me! I need to achieve  
ultimate sexy!"  
Blaze: "Whatever, loser..."  
*Blaze fire kicks toward Eggman's Eggmobile. This next part of the cutscene  
repeats after every boss afterwards.*  
Blaze: "Give me back..."  
"Blaze hits Eggman"  
Blaze: "The Sol Emeralds!"  
Eggman: "ONE STEP FARTHER FROM ULTIMATE SEXY!"  
Blaze: "Hmph!"  
*Sol Emerald drops from Eggman's Eggmobile as it disappears in the distance,  
Blaze grabs it.*  
Blaze: "Congratulations! Blaze the cat has received the first emerald!"  
-holds it up LoZ OoT style-

*Before Leaf Storm Zone*  
Blaze: "But how am I going to find the other six? And where the hell am I!?  
I need to find the emeralds, but I'm lost! Huh? What's that?"  
*Cream and Cheese hiding in a bush*  
Cream: "(Shh! Shut up or she'll spot us, Cheese!)(When we get a little more  
closer to her, let's talk to her!)"  
Blaze: "What? Who in the name of fuck are you?"  
Cream: "Uh oh! She spotted us. THANKS A LOT, CHEESE! Hi, you're a pretty kitty!" *Cream bows*  
"My name is Cream. What's your name?"  
Blaze: "(...What. Who is this girl?)"  
Cream: "I've never seen you before. Let's be friends?"  
Blaze: "(...what.)"  
Cream: "... ... ..."  
Blaze: "GET AWAY FROM ME!"  
Cream: "YOU KNOW HOW TO SPEAK! What's your name?"  
Blaze: "...Blaze."  
Cream: "Let's go to my house!"  
Blaze: "What."  
Cream: "Okay, let's go!"  
Blaze: "OH MY GOD! (Now I want to kill myself. Seriously.)"  
*Cream picks up Blaze and flies her to Cream's House*  
Cream: "LET'S GO INSIDE!"  
Blaze: "(I feel sick now. D:)"  
Vanilla: "What's up, baby?"  
Cream: "Hi, mom. I've brought an uber sexy friend home today!"  
Blaze: "...What."  
Vanilla: "You're a pretty kitty. Don't eat my daughter... or else."  
Cream: "I met my friend Blaze when I was wandering around!"  
Vanilla: "Oh Blaze, I hope Cream wasn't bothering you."  
Blaze: "...You're talking too much for my mind to process it all! What will happen if I eat Cream?"  
Vanilla: "Oh dear. Please relax. I insist you sit down before you leave."  
Blaze: "(One moment she's threatening me, the next she's offering for me to sit down... what's up with these people?) ... ... ..."  
*Blaze sits down and the house is burned to the ground*  
Vanilla: "...I'll be in the kitchen!"  
Blaze: "(All I did was sit down! D:)"  
Cream: "You know... you burned down my house!"  
Vanilla: "The kitchen is fine, don't worry!"  
Blaze: "Um..."  
Vanilla: "THE KITCHEN DOESN'T WORK! CREAM, GET THAT BITCH OUT OF MY HOUSE!"  
Cream: "Okay!"  
Blaze: "But it's not my fault D:"  
Cream: "Blaze, I'm still mad at you."  
Blaze: "(sigh) (Well, I am hungry. Having a bunny around is fine. I can eat her later.)  
Whatever."  
Cream: "All right! Mom, get a new house. We need one."  
Vanilla: "Just get her out of my house..."

*After Leaf Storm Boss Fight*  
Eggman: "DAMN YOU!"  
Sonic: "Seeya later, Eggman!"  
*Sonic sees Sol Emerald*  
Sonic: "Un?"  
*brief screen of Sonic/Blazes face... column of fire engulfs Emerald, Blaze  
appears*  
Sonic: "HEY!"  
Blaze: "Finally, I've got the second one... *looks at Sonic* ...STOP LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT!"  
*Blaze is running through a forest*  
Blaze: "There are five more I must get, can't waste a single breath!"

*After Mirage Road Boss Fight. Mountain North of Night Carnival.*  
Cream: "Blaze, let's go to McDonald's!"  
Blaze: "I don't know what that is, but it doesn't sound delicious."  
Cream: "WHAT?! HOW DARE YOU!"  
Blaze: "(I'm so hungry...)(Oh shit! My world is being affected already!)(The people I told here don't seem concerned..)"  
Cream: "OH!"  
Blaze: "What..?"  
Cream: "KNUCKLES! Get your ass over here!"  
Blaze: "Who's Knuckles? Is he your boyfriend? (Now I feel like a babysitter.)(At least I'm not lost.)(I just need the last four Sol Emeralds.)(Once I have them, I can eat her.)"  
Knuckles: "Yo, Cream!"  
Blaze: "..."  
Cream: "He's Knuckles! He's kinda stupid!"  
Knuckles: "What?!"  
Cream: "UM... you were hearing things."  
Blaze: "(She's pretty stupid herself.)"  
Knuckles: "So, aren't you going to introduce me?"  
Cream: "BLAZE!"  
Knuckles: "YOU LOOK MEAN! Hey, what do you have in your hands?"  
Blaze: "GO AWAY!"  
Knuckles: "CHAOS EMERALDS!"  
Blaze: "(What the hell is a Chaos Emerald...?)"  
Knuckles: "Give them to Sonic so he can transform and kick Eggman's ass!"  
Blaze: "(What's a Sonic?) I DON'T HAVE CHAOS EMERALDS! GO AWAY!"  
Knuckles: "HOW DARE YOU LIE TO ME! Wait..."  
*Knuckles dashes off*  
Blaze: "(I've wasted too much time on that son of a bitch!)"  
Knuckles: "What's this..."  
*Knuckles hits rocks*  
Blaze: "I'm out."  
Cream: "Wait for me!"  
Blaze: "(What I have in my hands gives the power of ultimate sexy... if I don't have them all, I'll, the ugliest of people will become sexy and the sexiest will become ugly!)

*After Water Palace Boss Battle. Mountain north of Night Carnival*  
Cream: "WHERE THE FUCK IS SONIC?"  
Blaze: "_I don't need his help!_ Can't you people take a hint?! Besides, this "Sonic" sounds like..."  
Voice: "SONIC?! WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU! I WANT YOUR BABIES!"  
*It's Amy!*  
Amy: "SONIC?"  
Cream: "Hi Amy!"  
Amy: "Did you see Sonic?!"  
Blaze: "(She cut me off! Sonic sounds like a stupid fuck.)"  
Cream: "I'm looking for him too, but... you didn't say hi."  
Amy: "Whatever."  
Blaze: "Um, who is he?"  
Cream: "This is Amy. She's insane!"  
Amy: "Cream, we better have a little talk..."  
Cream: "No! We aren't going to talk about periods!"  
*Amy has hammer out...*  
Amy: "NOT THAT TALK!"  
*Amy chases after Cream*  
Blaze: "(...Why do they talk about that?) (This place is odd.)  
Amy: "So, who's the bitch?"  
Cream: "Blaze. She's my friend."  
Amy: "I'm Sonic's girlfriend for life!"  
Blaze: "What's a Sonic?"  
Amy: "Great! Wait... WHAT?! You don't know who Sonic is?! I HATE YOU!"  
Blaze: "(..I don't even...)  
Amy: "I gotta go!"  
Cream: "Tails is mean. He eats rabbits."  
Amy: "SAWNIC!"  
*Amy runs off*  
Blaze: "What..."  
Cream: "Let's follow Amy!"  
Blaze: "Huh?"  
Cream: "AMY WILL FIND SONIC FOR US!"  
Blaze: "(What is a Sonic?!)"  
Cream: "Blaze, you're crushing me!"  
Blaze: "(..Oh god.)  
Cream: "You let me go! Yay! Now let's go!"

*After Altitude Limit Boss Battle. On small island.*  
Sonic: "THERE YOU ARE!"  
Cream: "SONIC!"  
Blaze: "(So this is Sonic... looks gay if you ask me.)"  
Tails: "CREAM! Get away from her! She steals emeralds!"  
Cream: "Those were hers from the beginning."  
Sonic: "YOU EMERALD SNATCHING -bleep- -bleep- -bleeeep- -bleep-!"  
Blaze: "Thank you."  
Sonic: "THANK YOU?!"  
Blaze: "(That was sarcasm, stupid.) Thank you for being vulgar. Now leave me alone. I need to collect the Sol Emeralds and handle everything all by myself."  
Sonic: "What?!"  
Tails: "You're from an alternate dimension!"  
Blaze: "..."  
Sonic: "THERE IS ONLY ONE DIMENSION! No dimension can survive without me!"  
Blaze: "MY MISSION, BLUE HEDGEHOG! MINE!"  
*Blaze runs off*  
Cream: "BYE! Blaze, wait!"  
*Cream flies off after her*  
Blaze: "(My people... the natural order is in danger!)"  
Cream: "Blaze! You're stupid! You didn't ask for help!"  
Blaze: "He's gay."  
Crean: "No! HE IS FUCKING STRAIGHT!"  
Blaze: "(What the hell?)"

*After Huge Crisis Boss Battle. On small island.*  
Cream: "You have six gems!"  
Blaze: "I just need one more. (Hopefully the natural order is restored when I get it.)"  
Amy: "YOYO EVERYONE!"  
Cream: "Amy is my favourite rapper!"  
Blaze: "(What is a rapper? I don't even...)"  
Amy: "YO BITCH! -insert swearing every where-"  
Cream: "This is good music!"  
Blaze: "This stuff kind of... sucks."  
Amy: "KISS MY FUCKING ASS BITCH! MAH RHYMES ARE SEXY AND YOU JUST A HEXY FEXY"  
Blaze: "...what."  
Amy: "AH FUCK IT ALL! I MASTURBATE AT THE TABLE! YO!"  
Blaze: "(That's disgusting.)"  
Amy: "SEX IS HEALTHY! IF YOU MEAN AN SCARY, HAVE SOME SEX AND YOU'LL BE NICER!"  
Blaze: "(...!)  
Cream: "What's wrong with my music Blaze?! YOU JUST TURNED IT OFF!"  
Blaze: "(It's weird...)"  
Rolling Stones: "I see a red door and I want it painted black..."  
Blaze: "That's better."  
Knuckles: "THERE YOU ARE!"  
Cream: "It's Knuckles!"  
Knuckles: "Hey, you, cat bitch! It's payback time!"  
Amy: "...What did you do to him?"  
Cream: "It wasn't a big deal... he's just a butt."  
Amy: "That's normal. I'll deal with him."  
Blaze: "(...!)"  
Amy: "Aren't you in a hurry?"  
Cream: "Blaze, we're flying!"  
Blaze: "D: (NOOO, I'll feel sick again!)"  
*Cream flies Blaze up in the air*  
Amy: "Hey bastard! Wait a minute!"  
Knuckles: "This has nothing to do with you, Amy! My business is with that cat  
bitch!"  
Amy: "Look, that's why I called you a b-... Why I called you over! LISTEN!"  
Knuckles: "GET BACK HERE!"  
Cream: "We're safe!"  
Blaze: "...Uggghhh"  
Cream: "I love you Blaze!"  
Blaze: "...Ew."  
Cream: "As a friend!"  
Blaze: "(I hate it here.)

*Before Dead Line Boss Battle*  
Blaze: "The last Sol Emerald... Return it to me!"  
Eggman: "WHAT A TOUGH GIRL!"  
Sonic: "Hi Eggman!"  
Eggman: "Sonic! Get in line. I must beat this cat again. Then, when I have the  
emeralds, I'll have ultimate sexy..."  
Blaze: "... ... ... You stole the Sol Emeralds, and jeopardized natural balance... Just so  
you could get "ultimate sexy"?! I'll kill you slowly and painfully! Then I'll burn you, then I'll dance in your ashes and I'll throw them in a chest and chuck it into the ocean!"  
Sonic: "Harsh."  
Blaze: "My battle! MINE."  
Sonic: "Yea... not happening."  
Blaze: "I don't need your help!"  
Sonic: "You should get a boyfriend.."  
Blaze: "Why are you still here?"  
Sonic: "You could have thought that, you know!"  
Eggman: "Perfect! I'll probably get pornos!"  
*Sonic vs. Blaze is the boss battle.*

*One hit left in Sonic vs. Blaze fight*  
Blaze: "I SAID... I don't need your fucking help!"  
Sonic: "No, YOU NEED HELP!"  
Blaze: "WHAT? You don't know anything! I AM A GUARDIAN! I have a curse and it is terrible!"  
Sonic: "...What."  
Blaze: "I WILL KILL YOU TOO!"  
*Fight continues with them trying to push each other off edge of platform*

*After Sonic vs. Blaze fight*  
Sonic: "You broke my leg... and my arm... and my ribs.. and my jaw..."  
Blaze: "Shut up."  
Sonic: "Can't you be at least a little nice? (She's so mean.) Accept help, girl!"  
Cream: "Blaze!"  
Blaze: "Oh goodie! I'm hungry!"  
Sonic: "What are you going to do?!"  
Blaze: "...nothing."

*Before Final Zone*  
Sonic: "Beautiful things have been turning ugly until you got the last emerald."  
Blaze: "ONLY I CAN HAVE THEM! Cream, let's blow this joint."  
Nothing: "... ... ..."  
Sonic: "Where is that bunny?"  
Blaze: "Cream?"  
Tails: "SONIC!"  
Sonic: "WHAT?!"  
Tails: "CREAM GOT KIDNAPPED BY EGGMAN!"  
Blaze: "NO!"  
Tails: "HE GAVE ME A LETTER!"  
Blaze: "GIVE ME IT!"  
Eggman's Letter: "Mwa ha ha ha. I am Doctor Ivo Robotnik! I have taken Cream. If you  
want me to return her... Blaze must come to Point W alone!"  
Sonic: "What."  
Tails: "It must be a trap!"  
Sonic: "YEAH!"  
Blaze: "No."  
Sonic: "Yeah, even she agr- Wait, WHAT?!"  
Blaze: "BYE!"  
*Blaze leaves*  
Tails: "Sonic, are you sure?"  
Sonic: "Yeah."  
Tails: "...Sonic."

*One Hit Left Final Zone. Final Zone Boss is giant robot.*  
Eggman : "DIE!"  
*Humorous scene, since he rams the giant robot into the side of the stage  
trying to hit Blaze and instead it eventually just gets stuck there without  
harming Blaze at all, allowing Blaze to easily hit it one last time.*

*After Final Zone. This cutscene is a lot of pictures. Blaze is looking at  
destroyed giant robot.*  
Blaze: "Time to rummage."  
*Blaze searching through wreckage*  
Blaze: "Cream! Do you hear me, Cream? ... She's not here. (I'm so hungry D:)"  
*Blaze looks up*  
Blaze: "Un?"  
*Cream falling from sky*  
Cream: "Blaze!"  
*Cream about to hug Blaze*  
Cream: "Blaze!"  
Blaze: "..."  
Cream: "We're friends! Right?"  
Blaze: "Hell no!"

*Blaze eats Cream*


	2. Sonic's Story

*Before Leaf Storm Boss Battle*  
Sonic: "Eggman! What are you up to now?"  
Eggman: "Sonic, you little pest! Soon, ultimate sexy will be within my grasp.  
And I shall be the sexiest!"  
Sonic: "...Nani?"

*After Leaf Storm Boss Battle*  
Eggman: "DAMN YOU!"  
Sonic: "Seeya later, Eggman!"  
*Sonic sees Sol Emerald*  
Sonic: "Un?"  
*brief screen of Sonic/Blazes face... column of fire engulfs Emerald, Blaze  
appears*  
Sonic: "HEY!"  
Blaze: "Finally, I've got the second one... *looks at Sonic* ...STOP LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT!"  
*Blaze takes off*  
Sonic: "She took the emerald!"

*Before Water Palace Zone. Tails appears*  
Sonic: "Oy, what's up? I saw some mysterious chick steal my emerald!"  
Tails: "Sonic, this is serious! An emerald thief is running around! And Eggman wants ultimate sexy!"  
Sonic: "I know, Tails! A shitstorm is coming, a shitstorm, I tell ya!"  
*Sonic runs off*  
Tails: "Sonic! Wait!"  
*Tails runs off after him*

*Before Water Palace Boss Battle*  
Sonic: "Kiss my ass, Eggman!"  
Eggman Nega: "HAhAHAHAHAHAAAA"  
Sonic: "What?"  
Eggman Nega: "Oh, I'm not Eggman..."  
Sonic: "What's wrong with you, Eggman?! Are you sick?!"  
Eggman Nega: "I am not Eggman. I am DOCTOR EGGMAN NEGA."

*After Water Palace Boss Battle*  
Eggman Nega: "Shit's going down!"  
Sonic: "The shitstorm is worse than I thought!"

*After Water Palace Boss Battle*  
Sonic: "He's a strange little man..."  
Tails: "He looks just like Eggman!"  
Sonic: "Well, duh."  
Tails: "Sonic, this is serious."  
Sonic: "Whatever."

*At Tail's Workshop, before Mirage Road Zone*  
Sonic: "Tails, you better find something interesting."  
Tails: "THERE IS A TEAR IN THE SPACE-TIME CONTINUUM!"  
Sonic: "Cool!"  
Tails: "It's expanding! If it continues to expand... the fabric of reality will become altered!"  
Sonic: "Sounds like my kind of game."  
Tails: "Sonic! What is wrong with you?!"  
Sonic: "I want adventure, Tails."  
Tails: "Sonic, let's do this!"  
Sonic: "Right-ee-o!"

*After Mirage Road Boss Battle*  
Sonic: "How should I kick his ass?"  
Tails: "Sonic, we need more information!"  
Sonic: "And?"

*At Cream's House, before Night Carnival Zone*  
Tails: "This is Cream's house! Strange... it was way better last time I saw it. Vanilla, what happened?"  
Vanilla: "Hi! Oh, my house got burned down."  
Tails: "Did a cat come here?"  
Vanilla: "Oh, she burned down my house and took Cream."  
Tails: "!"  
Sonic: "That's horrible!"  
Tails: "I agree! Where did they go?"  
Vanilla: "I think they went... uh... that way?"  
Sonic: "BYE VANILLA!"  
Tails: "Thanks so much!"  
Vanilla: "Or was it that way..."

*Mountain north of Night Carnival. After Night Carnival Boss Battle. A rock  
pile is blocking the road.*  
Sonic: "What's that?"  
Tails: "Sonic! The road is closed. Let's go find another way."  
*Voice comes from under rocks*  
Voice: "Help!"  
Sonic: "Did you hear something?"  
Voice: "HELP!"  
*Knuckles out from other rocks*  
Tails: "Hey! It's Knuckles!"  
Knuckles: "Cat bitch... she..! UAGHAHGA"  
Tails: "What are you doing under there?"  
Knuckles: "(My head...) Because of her!"  
Tails: "Who's her?"  
Knuckles: "That cat bitch with an attitude! She was with Cream."  
Sonic: "It's her!"  
Tails: "Where did she go?"  
Knuckles: "SHUT UP! I'm MAD!"  
*Knuckles punches rocks then leaves*  
Sonic: "Knux?"  
Tails: "BE THAT WAY!"  
Sonic: "He's such an asshole!"  
Tails: "He opened the road for us."  
Sonic: "Tails, how come we didn't jump over it?"

*After Huge Crisis Boss Battle. Small Island. Blaze and Cream appear*  
Sonic: "THERE YOU ARE!"  
Cream: "SONIC!"  
Blaze: "(So this is Sonic... looks gay if you ask me.)"  
Tails: "CREAM! Get away from her! She steals emeralds!"  
Cream: "Those were hers from the beginning."  
Sonic: "YOU EMERALD SNATCHING -bleep- -bleep- -bleeeep- -bleep-!"  
Blaze: "Thank you."  
Sonic: "THANK YOU?!"  
Blaze: "(That was sarcasm, stupid.) Thank you for being vulgar. Now leave me alone. I need to collect the Sol Emeralds and handle everything all by myself."  
Sonic: "What?!"  
Tails: "You're from an alternate dimension!"  
Blaze: "..."  
Sonic: "THERE IS ONLY ONE DIMENSION! No dimension can survive without me!"  
Blaze: "MY MISSION, BLUE HEDGEHOG! MINE!"  
*Blaze runs off*  
Cream: "BYE! Blaze, wait!"  
*Cream flies off after her*  
Sonic: "This is odd..."  
Tails: "Sonic, stop thinking of how odd and fun this is and follow her!"

*After Altitude Limit Boss Battle*  
Tails: "Sonic! The tear got bigger! This is horrible!"  
*Voice calls out from distance*  
Voice: "SONIC!"  
Sonic: "AMY?!"  
Amy: "Sonic, I want your babies."  
Sonic: "Uh..."  
Amy: "I said... I want your babies."  
Sonic: "No."  
Tails: "Sonic, ask her."  
Sonic: "Amy, have you seen Eggman or a cat chick named Blaze?"  
Amy: "A girl? I thought Blaze was a boy's name! What do you need from her?! No, it can't be sex! I won't stand for it!"  
*Amy has such a horrific face and clinched fists I have to mention it*  
Sonic: "Tails. Help."  
Tails: "All right."  
Amy: "I understand. I saw her."  
Sonic: "Where?"  
Amy: "She came this way with Cream."  
Sonic: "You should tell us this stuff more often!"  
*Sonic runs off*  
Amy: "You're so rude, Sonic!"  
Tails: "Bye Amy!"

*Before Dead Line Boss Battle*  
Sonic: "AHA! I find you Eggman Nega!"  
Eggman Nega: "I don't have time for you."  
Unidentified Voice: "Take your time, Eggman Nega."  
*Sonic recognizes voice as Blaze*  
Sonic: "Blaze?"  
Blaze: "I shall destroy you."  
Eggman Nega: "Oh Blaze, my dear. I didn't expect to see you in this world. It  
seems Eggman has made a mistake."  
Blaze: "... So you guided Eggman to our world."  
Eggman Nega: "Hahaha, now you have to repeat the lines you said to him. Trolololo"  
Blaze: "(God, do I need to repeat this whole scene? For Eggman Nega?!) I'll kill you slowly and painfully! Then I'll burn you, then I'll dance in your ashes and I'll throw them in a chest and chuck it into the ocean!"  
Sonic: "Harsh."  
Blaze: "My battle! MINE."  
Sonic: "Yea... not happening."  
Blaze: "I don't need your help!"  
Sonic: "You should get a boyfriend.."  
Blaze: "Why are you still here?"  
Sonic: "You could have thought that, you know!"  
Eggman Nega: "I like this world. It's so fun!"  
*Sonic vs. Blaze is the boss battle.*

*One hit left in Sonic vs. Blaze fight*  
Blaze: "I SAID... I don't need your fucking help!"  
Sonic: "No, YOU NEED HELP!"  
Blaze: "WHAT? You don't know anything! I AM A GUARDIAN! I have a curse and it is terrible!"  
Sonic: "...What."  
Blaze: "I WILL KILL YOU TOO!"  
*Fight continues with them trying to push each other off edge of platform*

*After Sonic vs. Blaze Battle*  
Sonic: "Can you stand up, Blaze?"  
Blaze: "Shut up."  
Sonic: "Can't you be at least a little nice? (She's so mean.) Accept help, girl!"  
Cream: "Blaze!"  
Blaze: "Oh goodie! I'm hungry!"  
Sonic: "What are you going to do?!"  
Blaze: "...nothing."

*Before Final Zone*  
Sonic: "Beautiful things have been turning ugly until you got the last emerald."  
Blaze: "Whatever."  
Cream: "Blaze, don't you dare say whatever to something as serious as this!"  
Tails: "I agree Cream! Our partners are just too rude and uncaring!"  
*Cream is crying... sad...*  
Cream: "This is horrible!"  
Sonic: "Yay!"  
Blaze: "The two Eggmans!"  
Cream: "Those two guys who are fat?"  
Sonic: "Blaze stay here."  
Blaze: "I have to stay here because I'm a girl?!"  
Sonic: "I'll be back!"  
Blaze: "Sometimes it's just useless."  
Cream: "Blaze..."  
Sonic: "Smart thinking! Cream, you stay here with Blaze! Okay, let's go, Tails!"  
Tails: "Let's go!"

*One Hit Left Final Zone. Final Zone Boss is giant robot.*  
Eggman Nega: "YOU WILL DIE, SONIC THE HEDGEHOG!"  
*Humorous scene, since he rams the giant robot into the side of the stage  
trying to hit Sonic and instead it eventually just gets stuck there without  
harming Sonic at all, allowing Sonic to easily hit it one last time.*

*After Final Zone. This cutscene is a lot of pictures. Sonic is looking at  
destroyed giant robot.*  
Sonic: "Too easy!"  
*Tails and a lot of small animals appear*  
Tails: "Sonic, my mommy and daddy are alive!"  
Sonic: "Yeah!"  
*Scene changes to Sonic looking a little worried, or at least into the  
background, Blaze eating Cream in the background*  
Tails: "What's the matter?"  
Sonic: "Cream just... died."  
*Knuckles appears*  
Knuckles: "Hey Sonic, I think you better split now."  
*Amy is running toward him*  
Sonic: "OH MY GOD!"  
*Sonic runs away from Amy who now has her hammer out while Tails and Knuckles  
watch."  
Sonic: "Tails, Knuckles, deal with her!"  
Amy: "SONIC, YOU, ME, BED! NOW! SEX! BABIES!"  
Tails: "...I'm scared."


	3. Final Story

*Before Extra Boss Battle. Blaze looking up at swirling dark clouds.*  
Blaze: "We just kicked ass. Now what? I can't go home."  
Eggman: "You will never have the power of ultimate sexy!"  
Eggman Nega: "She's only a guardian. She doesn't know how to unlock ultimate sexy."  
Blaze: "What?! How dare you insult me as a guardian! I will BURN YOU!"  
Eggman: "My world..."  
Eggman Nega: "and my world..."  
Eggman and Eggman Nega: "ARE TOGETHER!"  
Blaze: "So we have to fat eggs. I know, let's fry them."  
Eggman: "And, the Chaos Emeralds..."  
Eggman Nega: "and the Sol Emeralds are..."  
Eggman and Eggman Nega: "...when combined, ultimate sexy and ultimate power is in the hands of the ones who put them together!"  
Eggman: "They can be used for perfection!"  
Eggman Nega: "Or they can be used to create a world of destruction!"  
Eggman: "They are calling for each other to create either of the two."  
Eggman Nega: "This is delicious!"  
Eggman: "HAHAHAH"  
Eggman Nega: "WE ARE GENIUSES!"  
*Giant mecha shows up.*  
Eggman Nega: "Oh sweet mother of god! What is that?!"  
Blaze: "Eggman! HOW COULD YOU CREATE SUCH A HIDEOUS THING! It's hurting my eyes!"  
*Blaze is temporarily blinded and they steal the Sol Emeralds*  
Eggman: "I pity her that girl."  
Eggman Nega: "Why would you pity her?"  
Eggman: "The reason is obvious, Nega. SHE DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO USE THEM!"  
Sonic: "Hi Eggman."  
Eggman Nega: "Hello Sonic... SONIC?!"  
Eggman: "Oh god. Not that hedgehog again."  
Eggman Nega: "This is why I hate my life."  
Eggman: "I do too."  
Eggman Nega: "Let's take out Sonic and create Eggmanland."  
Eggman: "Come on Sonic!"  
*Mecha leaves. Sonic runs up besides Blaze.*  
Sonic: "Whatever! Blaze, get up."  
*Blaze tries to get up*  
Blaze: "Ughhh..."  
Sonic: "Are you all right, Blaze?"  
Blaze: "I'm blinded. I can see again!"  
Sonic: "Good! Now let's fuck and see what happens next."  
Blaze: "... Why do I even..."  
Cream: "Blaze-!"  
Blaze: "I thought you were dead! And why did you cut me off?!"  
Cream: "Blaze, you saved us!"  
Tails: "Good job Blaze! We took the power of the Sol Emeralds and kept it safe by chucking the power into the depths of Hell!"  
Sonic: "Now you can trust your friends!"  
Amy: "You can rely on us!"  
Knuckles: "I still hate her!"  
Blaze: "YOU DID WHAT?! I cannot trust you people. I just can't..."  
Sonic: "As long as you have the power of friendship, the Sol Emeralds..."  
*Sol Emeralds begin to glow again*  
Blaze: "THE SOL EMERALDS ARE ALIVE! And the power of friendship isn't that great."  
*Chaos Emeralds also glow*  
Sonic: "Let's do this!"  
Blaze: "Oh how it's so warm! I love this feeling!"  
*Sonic uses Chaos Emeralds to transform into Super Sonic, Blaze uses Sol  
Emeralds to transform into Burning Blaze. They go off into space to battle the  
Extra Zone Boss.*

*Immediately after last Hit with Sonic. Sonic and Blaze floating together  
looking at the mecha.*  
Sonic: "Blaze, you know what you said about it being warm?"  
Blaze: "...yes?"  
Sonic: "Well... that was.. inappropriate. The way you smiled and everything."  
*Blaze slaps Sonic*  
Eggman Nega: "I AM THE BEST!"  
Eggman: "THEY ARE STILL ALIVE, YOU DOPE!"  
*Blaze kills the mecha. Sonic watches in anger. He wanted to kill it.*

*Sonic and Blaze floating in space looking at each other. Blaze is especially  
happy during this scene.*  
Sonic: "This is it..."  
Blaze: "...Yes, it is!"  
Sonic: "Everything will be back to normal."  
Blaze: "I'm going home! Yes! No more idiots!"  
Sonic: "Blaze, you're being so rude. Cream is going to miss you."  
Blaze: "Yeah, you can just shoot her."  
Sonic: "What?!"  
Blaze: "It's better this way. She can die and I can go home."  
Sonic: "Blaze, will we ever see each other again?"  
Blaze: "!"  
Sonic: "I see. You hate us and don't want to see us ever again."  
Blaze: "Whatever."  
*Blaze smiles and floats away from Sonic. Sonic's reaction wasn't pleased. The cat just left.*  
*Next scene starts with Burning Blaze flying through a green sky.*  
Blaze: "I'm so glad to be back home! And away from those idiots!"  
Sonic (Blaze remembering what he said before she left his world): "Blaze, you need to like people."  
Blaze: "Douche bag."  
Sonic: "Blaze, I want you to come back so we can have another fun adventure like this!"  
Blaze: "...Yeah, like that's happening."  
*Blaze flies off*

*End of credits picture cutscene. Sonic lands on ground, finds Cream crying in  
the desert. Sonic whispers something into Cream's ear. Sonic shoots Cream and prepares to shoot Cheese.*


End file.
